LiveWire Peer Support Network

Printable Version of Topic "rivalry? or friendship?"

- LiveWire Teen Forums & College Forums (http://www.golivewire.com)
-- (http://golivewire.com/forums/support-teen.html)
--- Friends & Family (http://golivewire.com/forums/forum-7-s-0.html)
---- rivalry? or friendship? (http://golivewire.com/forums/peer-yeainai-support-a.html)


-- Posted by vortex91 at 2:42 am on Nov. 23, 2008

I'm really good friends with this girl and she's my total alter ego. We're always just a mark or two behind each other on tests and exams and in all other activities too. Anything I win an award in ...she's either winning the same place or a place behind :S however i'm REALLY competitive and though i think she's awesome there's always a tiny bit of me that's pissed when she's the one ahead. I know i'm a terrrrible person for feeling that way and not being supportive but believe me I wanna change.
What can I do to make myself feel better about myself when I'm in such a situation so I can OBJECTIVELY support her ...like I would any other friend (and not get jealous)    


-- Posted by blufindr at 2:43 am on Nov. 23, 2008

You just do it. I can't tell you how. You just learn to treat it as a friendly competition.


-- Posted by isobel at 2:44 am on Nov. 23, 2008

Don't compete together.


-- Posted by hyperlite at 2:50 am on Nov. 23, 2008

Just compete together in team sports so u own everyone but both win.


-- Posted by Gaelle at 2:50 am on Nov. 23, 2008

It's impossible. You'll always be rivals, you'll always be a bit jealous of one another.

My boyfriend and I have this going on.


-- Posted by vortex91 at 7:53 am on Nov. 23, 2008

Quote: from hyperlite at 2:50 am on Nov. 23, 2008


Just compete together in team sports so u own everyone but both win.

yeah, i tried that and we were AMAZING! coz we know exactly how the other one is thinking...
but frankly, not everything is a team sport...and i really want to get rid of this feeling coz it kinda nags me all the time..makes me get all paranoid thinking eeryone likes her more than me (its sick i know)..probably makes me perform worse...and besides, today it's her, tomorrow it'll be someone else and i might miss out on some really good friendships because of it.
i've tried a lot, and frankly i'm beginning to think people aren't capable of changing the way they feel..they might change the way the act on it..so i cd just bottle everything up inside and pretend to be happy 4 her coz it's the right thing to do. (but i'll be one hell of a hypocrite) *sigh*


-- Posted by vortex91 at 7:56 am on Nov. 23, 2008

Quote: from Gaelle at 2:50 am on Nov. 23, 2008


It's impossible. You'll always be rivals, you'll always be a bit jealous of one another.

My boyfriend and I have this going on.


hmm..i guess...it is hard to be in a relationship where the time ur bf feels good abt himself is when u feel a teensy bit bad abt urself for not being better:S (it's impossible to be completely un-insecure) and the same way, it bugs me that i can be selfish enough to feel bad ...
damn cut throat competitiveness!  


www.golivewire.com