-- Posted by GI at 9:19 am on July 13, 2008 So I work as a teacher's aide/generally help around the school, in a primary school. (aged 4-11) Basically, I won't use his real name, Johnathon (6), is always coming in with odd bruises and scratches, and he's very quiet. Like he's hiding something. At one point he came in with a huge burn on his leg and said he'd 'fell on the fireplace.' I'd love to confront the mother, as it's getting out of hand, but I'm scared that if I do she'll just...well I don't want to imagine what she'd do to Jon, because she drinks. If I told the authorities, would they take him away straight away? I'm not aware of the process and I don't want to put the kid in danger. What should I do? -- Posted by katzkitten at 9:20 am on July 13, 2008 maybe your over reacting a little? -- Posted by SpottedTiger at 9:20 am on July 13, 2008 Tell social services. They'll probably run a check on his house and see the sircumstances. They DO NOT take things like this lightly, you'll be doing the right thing. -- Posted by Skip at 9:21 am on July 13, 2008 Tell the other teachers you work with first.  This obviously could be a case of child abuse.  The authorities probably wouldn't take the kid away until further investigation had been done.  But tell someone for sure, asap -- Posted by bravosquadsas at 9:21 am on July 13, 2008 if you're that concerned then talk to someone more senior at the school about it and get their opinion. they may be able to get social services to talk to him about it without his mum knowing. -- Posted by StopXXwatch at 9:21 am on July 13, 2008 I would call like a drinker hotline and see what you can do. -- Posted by shandaboo93 at 9:21 am on July 13, 2008 idk try to talk to the kid..see what you can get out of him -- Posted by IceTeaEdwin at 9:21 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from katzkitten at 9:20 am on July 13, 2008 maybe your over reacting a little? That's not nice. -- Posted by Skip at 9:22 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from katzkitten at 12:20 pm on July 13, 2008 maybe your over reacting a little? wow.  Are you oblivious or what -- Posted by leveena at 9:22 am on July 13, 2008 Have you talked to the boy? I know you say he's quiet, but if you try to comfort him and assure him that you're here to help and listen, maybe he'll eventually come around. My second shot would probably be the authorities. They might end up taking him away, but it's better than what he's going through, if what I'm assuming is correct. I wouldn't even dare confront the parents. They'll probably say nothing is wrong. -- Posted by Sammy1991 at 9:22 am on July 13, 2008 The school would have to investigate before getting Social Services in... -- Posted by JustHavingFun at 9:23 am on July 13, 2008 Why not ask advice off of the other teachers? See if they've noticed anything suspicious or if your just gettin kinda paranoid about it. -- Posted by RockerTori106 at 9:23 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from SpottedTiger at 12:20 pm on July 13, 2008 Tell social services. They'll probably run a check on his house and see the circumstances. They DO NOT take things like this lightly, you'll be doing the right thing. This -- Posted by Skip at 9:23 am on July 13, 2008 GI.  Talk to the other teachers first.  Cause they are more experienced and would know how to handle it.  They would probably be better off informing authorities, as well.  You can talk to the kid about it, but be very cautious, because often the kid will either get very emotional, clam up, or tell his parents about his day and that he talked to you -- Posted by cherrys77 at 9:23 am on July 13, 2008 Tell the authorities. Whatever happens obviously this child will be better off. -- Posted by redhotchilis64 at 9:24 am on July 13, 2008 In the US, teachers are required to notify the authorities with stuff like that. I couldn't tell you what would happen if you did tell the cops on him, because I don't know the laws in the UK. I would just do what you think is best for the child. If you really do think he's being abused (it sounds like he is), then you should call the cops. If the child wasn't being abused, the mother should be able to prove it, and get her child back. If she does abuse him, she goes to jail and the kid would probably go to live with a relative. (in the US anyways, I'm assuming they do the same things in the UK) -- Posted by GI at 9:24 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from leveena at 9:22 am on July 13, 2008 Have you talked to the boy? I know you say he's quiet, but if you try to comfort him and assure him that you're here to help and listen, maybe he'll eventually come around. My second shot would probably be the authorities. They might end up taking him away, but it's better than what he's going through, if what I'm assuming is correct. I wouldn't even dare confront the parents. They'll probably say nothing is wrong. I'm always trying to talk to him...but he just tends to shy away from the question. I'll try and contact the proper authority. I hope the mother doesn't hurt him as a result... -- Posted by Skip at 9:25 am on July 13, 2008 GI do you think you're emotionally ready to be able to talk to authorities about an issue as critical as this?  If you don't feel you are then don't do it.  Tell the teachers instead -- Posted by foxypunk at 9:27 am on July 13, 2008 you need to tell someone straight away that is a very seriose matter and if he is being abused you could save his life -- Posted by campina at 9:29 am on July 13, 2008 you are an aide remember.. so tell the teachers.. you shouldn't be dealing stuff directly with authorities or the parents -- Posted by cadetjones2011 at 9:29 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from SpottedTiger at 9:20 am on July 13, 2008 Tell social services. They'll probably run a check on his house and see the sircumstances. They DO NOT take things like this lightly, you'll be doing the right thing. try this -- Posted by GI at 9:31 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from Skip at 9:25 am on July 13, 2008 GI do you think you're emotionally ready to be able to talk to authorities about an issue as critical as this? If you don't feel you are then don't do it. Tell the teachers instead Maybe the headmistress? She's got a pretty cool head. And thanks for all this. I think without someone telling me to calm down I'd probably do more harm than good. Right then. I think I'll tell Miss Donovan. -- Posted by SoaringFalcon2010 at 9:32 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from katzkitten at 9:20 am on July 13, 2008 maybe your over reacting a little? it is NEVER over reacting when it is about the life of a small child. child abuse can lead to death -- Posted by Day Old Blues at 9:33 am on July 13, 2008 First of all, I would inform his class teacher, if s/he isn't already aware of your concerns. They will be very grateful for you for noticing and will be able to help you with contacting local authorities or social services. I'm not sure how it works, but I doubt they would remove him from his mother at once. I understand you're worried about the gap between them visiting and coming back to see him, but I think you must act - a drunken, abusive mother is unpredictable and you can't let him suffer and the situation worsen unnecessarily. I really wouldn't confront the mother at this stage - if nothings going on she'd be really offended, and if it is then she'll deny it/be angry/probably think the kid told you about it and blame him. I'm sure if you explain your fears for Jon to the authorities, they'll understand the need to protect him, and would be able to keep him safe until a decision about his future could be made. Maybe giving Childline a ring would help, I know they often deal with children who are being abused. In the mean time, take extra care over the boy at school, and make sure he knows if he wants to speak to you about anything, he can. Thank you for helping him - I definitely want to do something to help children like him when I'm older. Good luck, and keep us informed of anything that happens? -- Posted by GI at 9:35 am on July 13, 2008 I will Day Old Blues. I've got work next work. Hopefully I'll have done something by then. -- Posted by Periwinkle at 9:36 am on July 13, 2008 You are right to be concerned. Even if it's nothing (though it sounds like something) it's still right of you to care. I think you should talk to the other teachers. I'm sure there's a specific set of things they're supposed to do in a situation such as this. -- Posted by GlassHearts at 9:56 am on July 13, 2008 I know its stupid, but you do have to be careful of certain questions you ask him otherwise you may get in trouble yourself.there was a similar case at a nursery i worked at and they were very careful with what they said.i agree with the idea of asking older staff and then contacting social services.hope you have success with this.x And to anyone saying about overreacting,its not just a few bruises,child abuse is common and could leave the child with physical + emotional damage.better safe than sorry. -- Posted by GI at 10:24 am on July 13, 2008 Quote: from katzkitten at 9:20 am on July 13, 2008 maybe your over reacting a little? That's ridiculous. There's no such thing as over reacting when it comes kids getting hurt. -- Posted by RainBowBow at 1:33 pm on July 13, 2008 don't tell the mother, just tell the child protective department secretly -- Posted by ignatius at 2:10 pm on July 13, 2008 Every schools should have a counselor or a educational psychologist hired , you should take the child and go to him/her. He/She will know what to do.