It's about my life.  

My mom and her ex keep stressing me out. They tell me to do one thing but then yell at me for doing it. I am really getting tired of this shit. I pisses me off.  

And i really don't need some kid telling me oh you should try talking to her about your feelings. That never helps.  

I mean i do what they say i watch the girls and DJ all the time. I mean am i really in the wrong? Am i really just fucked like that? I mean it is not just family. It is friends as well. I don't really care well i do but why should i? I mean they never ever fucking think about me. Never they are always saying hey man you can talk to me about anything. But when it comes to that time they are like sorry man i can't help you with that today try me tomorrow.Yet when they ask for my help i am right there the first one to help. You know since i have been on this website i have made a lot of friends and i have also met some enemies But when it comes down to it. There is a girl that don't get on anymore. I love her and when i Say i love her i don't mean that shit that a lot of people here say oh i love her but this and that.

I really fucking love this girl. But she don't have the time of day to even talk to me yet i was always fucking there for her? Does this make any fucking sense to you? It sure don't to me. I just you know it really gets old. I hate that i am always trying and no one wants to try with me. There is nothing i wouldn't do for my friends but they want to be difficult. I don't understand this. really i don't. Would you help me understand this whole situation? Because i cant figure this shit out. I try really hard to get everything how i want them. But it is not me it is everyone else.  

What do you make of all this? Some of the support leaders i wounder why are they are ever a support leader they like talk like they know everything about everything. That is really not the way to do it. for one you have to understand by reading between the lines. Hell i can tell a persons personality just by reading how they type i can tell if you are a good or bad person. You know i am the same way just by talking to someone i can tell if they are worth my time or not. A lot of the support leaders don't have any idea what they are talking about when they say shit. You know i am not perfect and i don't claim to be. I know a lot about what i talk about. I am very intellectual my IQ and my text scores where the best in the state. Yet when it came down to it i was in special ed. Why must it have been like that? Cuz i was born with more mental problems then you would care to know. And i know everything about what i have.  

I know i am stupid/naive.  

I best shut my mouth. I have more to say. But lets wait for another day okay?

Post edited at 7:22 pm on Oct. 7, 2009 by Thanantos

-------
Are we here? Or are we there? I don't know this is all just so confusing.

Maybe you are picking the wrong time to talk to your parents, i know you might feel over loaded with everything but oldest usually are. We are the maids,babysitters and caretakers.

A lot of people are selfish to be completely honest, they want people to listen to their problems but don't want to help with someone else's problems and sometimes people just don't know how to help and what to say. Maybe she descent know how to help and just descent want to say the wrong thing, it happens to everyone of us.

That because some of the support leaders end up saying the same thing over and over again that it feels like sometimes its computer generated ha truthfully it depends on the person and how well they try to help the situation. Some help because they have to and some help because they want to. Thats why the reply's can be full of feelings and some can be heartless.

World works in mysterious ways, i don't know why with hight intelligence you would be put into a special ed class though. Maybe you can talk to someone in charge of that and see if anything can be changed.

Honestly, I'm not too sure what i should say to you in a reply. That happens too.