I came back to my laptop and I have been crying again, but quietly because my mum's in the room.
I dont know what's wrong, I just dont have motivation to do anything right now. I dont know where the fuck I'm going in life either.

It pretty much sucks but I cant live like this I hate being down. I like when I'm full of joy. But I cant seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I just dont get why certain things happen to me and work out for others.

Ahhh
Help

If you are finding your life pointless then what you need to do is get you opportunities out,sit down and think of what you want to do. None of us can wave a magic wand, if you want help you have to be prepared to help yourself and that includes finding the motivation...even a little bit of it to just sit down and see what you can do with your life at the moment.