Sorry I didn't catch this until now. You aren't an idiot. Dealing with an eating disorder, especially trying to recover from one and reshape the whole way you live and think isn't an easy task! Cut yourself some slack. I'm really proud of you for trying, at least.
Here's what you do:
Go in and clear out all your pro ana/mia bookmarks, quotes, info on fasting, any blogs or anything related that you have book marked. Get rid of it and make sure it's gone for good- you really don't need to stumble upon it again like peri said, that would be a huge backlash and would set you back quit a bit.
Then, go search for some encouraging anti-ana/mia things, if you want, and start a whole new collection.
If you can't get into contact with any recovering anorexics or bulimics in real life, do some searching for a group online, but make sure these people's intentions are pure. Sometimes, even when people want to change, they don't give it their all and stay in the negative mindset that food is actually their enemy, and can often times drag others back into a relapse with them.
Surround yourself with people that care about you and are going to give you positive support.
You know all the tricks you learned to keep you from eating, to keep you distracted? You can still sort of use them, but you can use them to keep your mind of wanting to look at and think of the things that are going to trigger you.
You could find a way to reward yourself, too, for doing good, like going out and getting a manicure or a pedicure, or a haircut or colour job, or some new shoes or something.
I really wish you the best of luck and hope you check back to see this message.
-------
my lastfm ^^
924 users online 
222871 members 
You have 1 new message.
Patron
