There were these 3 guys working on an oil rig in the middle of the sea obviously (I think it was in my hometown).. and somehow the rig started sinking so the guys got on this inflatable raftboat thing and tried to sail across to get to land

They were all discussing and worrying how else they're gonna drown, such as lobsters coming up to their raft and pincing it, but eventually they did get pretty close to land.. but then all I heard was them dramatically shout "HUMBLEGRIFFIN!!!!" ... and even though I wasn't there, I somehow asked them who that was, they told me he was a mad serial killer who patrols the beach and murders anyone he walks past...

Next thing I knew the dude happened to have 3 pickaxes, and threw each one of them at all 3 guys, splitting their heads

And THEN after that I somehow see a cutscene (or something?) of the murderer laying seaweed on their grave, even though it was a few feet in the water

Seriously, LOLWUT?