I work, I get money. I give her money each week also. I have a stash of money that I have been saving for my holidays. I have offered to give her money if she needs it any time because I generally always have some money. She says that would all be well and gone but then would be back to square one and just have to owe it back to me. But I don't mind if she takes weeks to pay me back if it. I just don't know what to do about her. I can see how unhappy she is right now over money and I want to help, I can help. But she just won't let me help.

How can I convince her just to take money from me? Because I really have no problem. If I don't need it right now and have enough, I will gladly give her money if she needs it.

I think she feels like she can't keep taking money from her 18 year old daughter but I don't even have a problem with her doing it.

Tell here that you want to contribute to the household and you want to start paying rent for living in the house. This way you can rationalize giving her the money and she will have no problem accepting the money from her daughter if she sees it fit.

That's pretty nice of you to help out though.

Post edited at 12:52 pm on June 26, 2009 by Charolastra

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y'all nukhuhs that be aight wit dat bullshiiit, just hit us up mang

The thing though is she is struggling to pay the bills and make ends meet. It's not like she is going off to buy a new car or a new tv...It's actually bills. Phone, food, gas, rent everything.

And I already give her money each week.

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I work, I get money. I give her money each week also.

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If I could, I'd give it to her and not ask for it back but it is to pay for my holiday so I could need it back.

She may not want to take the money because she might feel like she'd have to pay you back for it and I don't think people want to get into any more debt right now. Just offer the money out of the goodness of your heart and she will take it.

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y'all nukhuhs that be aight wit dat bullshiiit, just hit us up mang

If she still absolutely refuses to accept your money then use it towards your younger brother. Not only will you be somewhat protecting him but you'll be lending your mother a huge relief from feeling bad about what she can't give him.

I'm going to assume that you live in America? I highly suggest that your mother apply for food stamps and welfare. She likely won't be able to get it for you because of your age, but she will definitely be able to get food stamps for your younger brother and likely herself.
My family (My mother, younger sister, and I) have been in a very similar situation for a few years. At first my mother was very stubborn and refused to apply for anything but finally, finally she applied for food stamps and welfare.
Welfare is a massive hassle. We didn't get it because we weren't able to fully document every single paycheck that I've gotten, even though my paychecks are tax exempt and whatnot because it's a work-study government program at my college. But if you can, it's definitly worth going through the hassle.
Food stamps were a lot easier, although I couldn't get them because I'm of age, and my mother couldn't either because she's a student. However they do provide it for my sister. Basically they give you like a check card that has a monetary value allotted to it monthly, and you can use it at stores like Wal Mart. Although you have to be very careful because you can only use it for food.
Don't be afraid to push your mother to take advantage of these programs. They're difficulty to apply for is frustrating, but it's an effort to prevent fraud.
I know a lot of people feel like they shouldn't need welfare, and a lot of people look down on those who receive it, but having assistance is certainly worth it.

Good luck.

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your whole life is leading up to this
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